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Sunday, November 20, 2005

Spiritual reality

Are you psychic? I am. Or used to be, over a decade ago. I was able to see a person's past or future, feel the presence of 'lost souls', and channel the words of spirit guides through automatic writing. I even ran a spiritual development group for a while, to help other people develop their own psychic abilities.

There was a spiritual church I went to a couple of times, but I stopped going when I realised that most of the people there were trapped in the past. They were there to talk to their dead loved ones through a medium. These spiritualists, as they called themselves, were so fixated on the past they couldn't move forward.

To me, spirituality is about life. It's about embracing everything that life can offer. It's about understanding yourself, the life you're living, and the life you want to live. Spirituality is about moving forward rather than staying stuck in the past.

My spirit guides talked to me through automatic writing. They talked to me in this way for over 2 years, giving me a lot of useful and informative advice and insights. They also confirmed to me that Estera - my partner at the time - and I would be together for the rest of our lives. However, we were together for less than 2 years before she decided to leave me.

This was particularly traumatic for me, not just because I lost someone I loved very much, but also because it went against what my spirit guides confirmed. Since they were wrong about that, what else could they have been wrong about?

My entire world view was shattered. The faith I had in my spirituality was shattered. I left behind the practice of psychic abilities, while still retaining my beliefs. It had seemed to me that my spirit guides were wrong due to the likelihood of me editing their message as I wrote it down, editing it to tell me what I wanted to hear. I felt that I couldn't trust myself with automatic writing any more. Over a decade later, I felt the same way.

The spiritual and psychic experiences I'd had, however, were real. They had been shared with or confirmed by others, so I knew spiritual reality was real. My life has continued over the past decade with that knowledge being the backbone of my experiences.

Spiritual reality has been the core of my existence, manifesting in how I live my life, the conversations I have with people, and the articles that I write. Last year I started transcribing into my website the automatic writing I'd done a decade earlier. A big project, which I really should finish sometime... I discovered an interesting little fact which I hadn't previously seen.
Q. Is Estera to become my life-partner?
A. So it is planned.
"So it is planned." And plans, as we know, can change. I had only remembered it being a 'yes'. They hadn't confirmed it at all, that her and I would be together forever. They only said it was planned that way, at that time.

I spent a decade believing the wrong thing.

Posted on 11/20/2005 06:18:00 PM


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3 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hi! Actually yes alot of spiritual medium types become trapped in repetition mode. The reasons are complicated and rambling, but eventually when I set up my spirit blog I'll be trying to explain phenomenon like that to the best of my ability. Most of the time they aren't actully talking to the purpose but to the magnetic field residues of the person's dead astral shell. Go figure. They don't know any better so its kind of funny. Anyhow, I love your 3 column set up and Im trying to that to my blogs. Im new to blogging but feel free to check out my main one oowr.blogspot.com. Its not what I want it to be yet..but it will be. Take care and keep blogging! :)

11/21/2005 01:33:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Woops I meant to say person instead of purpose..hehe sorry.

11/21/2005 01:34:00 AM  
Blogger Alan Howard said...

Master C: Can you explain more about what you mean?

Scot: I'm surprised you're into this stuff too... but yeh, you're right. The whole meaning of my post was that they were right, and I spent over a decade beliving they were wrong, when I could have done something completely different...

It's like, while I've moved on in a way, I also wonder how I might have moved on while continuing the channelling, etc.

But I also feel that I needed to move on in the way I did. What we experience was, in one way or another, what we're meant to experience.

11/21/2005 10:04:00 AM  

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