I wish you all a very happy new year. Please be safe and look after yourselves, and I look forward to catching up with you all in 2006.

All the best!

'Calling All Bloggers: These Documents Need Publishing'

The UK government, like the US government, has been quick to say they do not involve themselves in torture, and yet evidence proves otherwise.

The first document is a series of Telegrams that Craig sent to the Foreign Office, outlining his growing concern and disgust at our use of intelligence passed to the UK by the Uzbek security services.

http://users.pandora.be/quarsan/craig/telegrams.pdf

The second document is a copy of legal advice the Foreign Office sought, to see if they were operating within the Law in accepting torture intelligence, and according to Michael Wood the FCO legal adviser; it is fine, as long as it is not used as evidence.

http://users.pandora.be/quarsan/craig/npaper.jpg

You can find more information here.

Well, the end of the year anyway. This is an update of my life over the next few days, as I'm not entirely sure I'll have the time or opportunity to update this blog before I get back to NZ on the 3rd January.

Deidre and I are spending new year's eve with her friends David and Celeste. That's tomorrow.

Then on New Year's Day, I'm not exactly sure what we're doing. I think we might be staying with them for the day.

On the 2nd of January, we're going to be picked up by Deidre's mum, who will then take us to another of Deidre's family members, and have lunch with them, before returning to Wollongong.

On the 3rd, well... that's when I'm heading back to NZ. Tonight I organised to catch up with with Dan and Amanda on that day. Amanda's been in touch with me, wanting to catch up before I went back, so that's been organised tonight, for Tuesday 3rd. Deidre and I will be dropped off at Dan's that morning by Deidre's mum. Then we're all going into the city for lunch, where we'll catch up with Amanda and David, her partner. Then Dan is coming with Deidre and I to the airport, where they're going to see me onto the plane and say goodbye.

I don't know when I'll see Dan again, but it will probably be in February, as Deidre and I are coming back to Sydney then for a wedding we were invited to. Dan's given us his place for the time we're here, which is just great of him.

As for Amanda... the last time I saw her was when she drove me to the Canberra airport on the 13th June 2000. Five and a half years ago. I haven't seen her since, but have always kept in touch. In 2001 I was pissed off with her because I went to Brisbane and she wasn't interested in driving an hour to catch up with me. Even though I got over it, our relationship was lessened as a result. I think these days she feels more highly of me than I do of her, but I'm wondering if seeing her again will change that.

I'll write some more when I can. I've already made a 'happy new year' post which will be my last post for the year, and dated it for tomorrow night. It'll technically be my last post, even though this post has been written after it. So I'll wish you all a happy new year in this one as well.

I've been keeping this blog up to date not just for me, but for you. It's been an absolute pleasure to have been able to share with you my holiday, my adventures, my life and the people within it that are important to me. I look forward to sharing more of my life with you over the coming weeks, months and years.

Have an excellent new year, and I hope 2006 sees you achieve all of those dreams you create for yourself.

With love and blessings....


Alan

Peter, I and another friend of Peter's, Alex, went through an exercise that taught how to 'collapse' emotional issues with other people. The benefit of this process is to understand that the negative emotions you have are simply part of who you are, and that what you see in others is a reflection of yourself.

During the actual process, I was having some trouble doing what the process required, which is finding a whole lot of people I know - or who have known - that would see the same traits in me that I see in someone else. The person I picked had some pretty awful traits, including cruelty, and I was at a complete loss as to who in my life had seen those awful traits in me.

The purpose of this process is to find balance, based on the principle that whatever you see outside of you already exists within you. I understood the principle, but I was unable to 'own' it. I was unable to see a lot of things in myself that I see in others.

So I stopped doing it. We spent 12 hours on this, and I got nowhere. It was pretty disappointing, but it pointed out to me that I've got some kind of major block within me that's preventing me from seeing something about myself.

So now I just have to work out what the frack that is. I've lived with this block for over 30 years, and yet I don't know what the block is. I don't know how to define it, I don't know how it works or acts within me. I don't know a lot of things about it, so I have absolute no fracking idea how I'm going to deal with it.

Once we dropped Deidre off at her mum's place, we got a photo of the 3 of us: Deidre, me and Dan.

Dan and I chilled out for the rest of the day, ending up going to the movies and watching King Kong. It was alright. I really enjoyed some scenes, but I was disappointed with the 'relationship' that was developed between Anne and Kong. What kind of sick freak was she??? It was like, "Kong is my one true love. There's nothing and no one else more important in my life than the love I have for Kong." He's a freaking animal, for chrissakes! But... maybe she saw something that we never got to see. Maybe she saw his King Kong donger, and that was all she needed to know 'he's the one'.

Bleh.

I've been at Dan's since yesterday, and haven't had an opportunity to do my photos yet. I've just been chillin' with Dan. Yeh, yeh... photos are coming soon.

Now, tomorrow morning I'm off to my friend Peter H's place. That's where things are going to turn interesting... He's going to take me through something called a Breakthrough Experience. I've been reading the book, which is the precursor to doing a program that takes you beyond what the book teaches you. Peter swears it'll be life changing. Well, the book's pretty bloody good, and has some interesting life-altering stuff in it, so I'm looking forward to seeing how things are going to go with what Peter wants to do.

I'm here in Sydney at my mate Dan's place, and it's just after 1am. Deidre went to bed 2-3 hours ago, while Dan and I stayed up and spent time catching up with each other's lives.

This is just a quick update, to let you know what I've been doing. Since Christmas Day - just two days ago - I've been 'chilling out', relaxing and taking it easy. But at the same time, these relaxing times have been busy.

Photos are yet to come. I've got them all, I just haven't had the chance to go through them for the past couple of days. There's quite a few good ones, which seems to be a usual occurrence lately (thankfully), and I'll try to get them done over the next day or so. Again, depending on the availability of time. It's much more relaxed here at Dan's than at Deidre's mum's, with less 'events' to be part of, so I should be fine.

The spiritual community centre idea is gathering energy between Deidre and I. I'm very excited about it. I'm visualising it every day, seeing in my mind how it's going to look, how it's going to feel, and how the people are going to use it. Deidre and I are working through technical aspects, like accounting, business management, taxation, and so on. We're both working on the principal that you can't achieve it if you can't see it, so we're seeing every aspect of it as we move forward.

This is a photo of a Rosella in Deidre's mum's backyard.

We left Deidre's mum's place and headed north, into Sydney to be dropped off at Dan's place. On the way there, we went over the 'sea bridge'...

And then we stopped at a lookout over a place called Stanwell Park...

Do you know how to achieve your dreams?

It's really quite simple.

Are you doing what you need to do to achieve them?

That's all you need to ask yourself, and all you need to remember.

Have your dream in mind. Always. Even better, write it down. Refer to it often. If you are not doing something every single day towards your dream, then you are not serious about achieving it.

The secret to achieving your dreams is to do something every day that moves you closer to those dreams. If you're not doing something every day towards that result, then you're wasting your time - and your life.

Boxing Day

We went to a Buddhist monastery, which was an experience I was quite disappointed with. Cameras were not allowed to be used in any of the interesting areas, as a gesture of 'respect for Buddha'. So I didn't even bother going into most of those areas where cameras weren't allowed. I felt like, if my camera can't go in, then there's no point me going in. Bastards. To top it all off, everyone in there was trying to get money from the visitors. There were people running around with donation buckets, there were stalls where things were for sale, and arts and crafts. The entire 'buddhist experience' at this place left me with a foul taste in my mouth.



Luckily, however, the day wasn't a write off, as we went to a nice beach at Wollongong. There was a beach, people, even a lighthouse. I got a few good photos, but these were the best.

I'm sitting here on a beach after having spent xmas day with Deidre and a bunch of her mum's side of the family. It was... interesting.

There were all ages, from 9 years old up to 80 years old. Or maybe not that old, but close to it! One of her uncles regaled me with stories of his time in the army and in Vietnam. Oh, and the food and drinks were great!

For the past week or so I've had this vision playing out in my head of a spiritual centre. It has a large room for people to have group meetings, meditations, or to simply relax. It has a number of rooms that are used by various people for massage, reiki, reflexology, psychic readings, etc etc. It has a room - or rooms - used as a library of spiritually related books, containing new and secondhand books on various spiritual and new age topics, as well as music and audio material. It acts as a spiritual community centre, allowing people to come together and find ways of healing and growth. There's also a large garden area, like a Japanese or Chinese garden, that will allow people to find relaxing, secluded spots under the trees and meditate in front of the small stream and waterfalls.

This is my vision. It's not a new idea, as there are already a number of such places here and there. There isn't, however, anything like it in Wellington or Canberra, as far as I know. There is in Adelaide, where I received the reiki, and where I received the inspiration for this vision, to do it myself.

I'm thinking of starting something in Wellington, then moving to Canberra and starting another one. I don't see why I can't have two such centres at the same time, and when I do well with both, I could even 'franchise' the idea out for others to do. Imagine one or a few in lots of large towns and cities around the countries.

Yes, this will change my life. Yes, this will be my new 'career'. I don't know how long it will take, but I'm looking at making it substantial by the end of 2006.

I'm setting the energy in motion, starting the process of this becoming a reality.

"If you build it, they will come."

Christmas Day

A day of food, festivity, presents, (Deidre's) family, and finally the beach. A lovely day.

It's Christmas time, and here I am, uploading 'day 13' photos. I'm back on the 56k connection via telephone line, and oh, my, God. The pain! It's so slow!

But anyway, I'd like to wish you all a Merry Christmas. I'm having an absolute ball with my christmas, and I hope you, wherever you are and whatever you're doing, are having an absolute ball with yours.

My thoughts are with all of you, wherever you are around the world. Even if I don't know you, I know you're out there. That's enough to wish you all the best.

Peace be with you.

After breakfast at the hotel we went to the Chinese Gardens that were just around the corner from the hotel. Remember, this is at Darling Harbour, in the centre of Sydney. Amazing...

This was my very first attempt ever at a new technique I read about, where you adjust the shutter exposure down to 1/15th of a second when you want to take a photo of a waterfall or something like it. It smooths the water and gives a very pleasant photo...


We found lizards in the gardens as well. I like this shot...






After we finished at the gardens we went for another walk around Darling Harbour. Naturally, I had to take a photo of the Australian flag that was flying. I'm very patriotic, did you know?


While on our last walk around Darling Harbour, we got ourselves a drink before we headed off to the train station to go south for an hour, to where Deidre's mum would pick us up. This is us on the train, and me with my new hat. I got sick of wearing a cap and yet still getting my ears and neck sunburnt in Canberra, and I only wish I'd bought it earlier. Deidre helped me pick it out, saying it was the only hat that suited me, and which she'd be seen dead with me...


I helped Deidre's mum, Lesley, buy herself a xmas present - a new laptop. I helped her get a good deal on a good laptop that suited her needs. Nowhere near what I'd get for myself, but considering my standards are over $3000 and her needs are less than $1000, she ended up getting a great laptop as far as I'm concerned. I then spent a few hours setting it up for her. This is a photo of her new laptop in the front and mine in the back; I was playing with them both while sitting in the lounge room having something to eat...

It's going to be 39 degrees (102 fahrenheit) here in Sydney today. It's only 9am and it's already 35. OUCH! It's going to be bloody hot.

Wellington is 15 degrees today.

I've had some ideas for new websites. January will see their development. Stay tuned, you might find them interesting.

• Catching up with Simon and Ben, for the first time in 11 years
• Seeing my parents again, after 11 years apart
• Buying a TV, cabinet and kettle for my parents for xmas, which made their lives just a little bit easier and more interesting
• Deidre's dad telling her and I that he wouldn't mind if I wanted to call him 'dad'
• Back in Canberra after 4 years and finding that my friends were still my friends - nothing's changed
• Showing Deidre the kangaroos that abound in and around Canberra
• Deidre saying she's happy to move to Canberra instead of Sydney

Part of the trip to Canberra, for both her and I, was to find out if she liked it enough to prefer living there instead of Sydney. I'm pleased that she's agreed that Canberra is likely to be a much better place to live than Sydney. Phew!

The next year is going to be interesting...

We left Canberra around 8am, heading for the coast where my friend Kath lives. Here's the coast...

And here's some of the lovely inhabitants of the coast...

We dropped in on Kath, a wonderful person who was once my spiritual mentor. It was fantastic catching up with her again, and seeing how happy she was with her new role as a teacher, helping long-term unemployed finding themselves and moving out into the workplace.

We made it to Darling Harbour...



After a seafood dinner at a lovely restaurant overlooking the harbour, we went for a walk. I got some nice night time shots...



We found a Starbucks, had a drink and watched the people go by. It was awesome.

Deidre and I are having a lovely, relaxing, do-nothing day today. This morning we went into civic, the centre of Canberra, and had brunch.

After brunch we had a brief walk around Civic, just so I can show you the following scenes of the centre of civic. There's a very strong cafe culture here, which is just awesome.






Canberra is such a beautiful place, and I hope you've been able to see some of that through my photos.

We're about to go to visit my friend Damien. I'll get some photos this time, as I didn't get any when we had dinner with him and his wife, Jamie, and their daughter, the other night. Tonight we're catching up with Darlene again, with drinks at her house. I'll get to see her kids again. I remember them as 4 and 6 years old, now they're 11 and 13...

Today is the last day here, which I'm very sad about. Tomorrow morning, 7am, we're leaving, driving to the coast to visit my friend Kath for an hour or two, before heading north up the coast to Wollongong. We're going to drop in on Deidre's mum and offload most of our luggage, taking only overnight bags with us to Sydney. Tomorrow night we're staying at the Novotel Hotel in Darling Harbour, a very exclusive and beautiful tourist spot.

Don't worry, you'll get to see the photos. :-)

Many people talk about how things are 'meant to be', about the synchronicity of events in their lives, and the hidden meanings behind those events.

For example, Deidre and I went for a walk up a mountain yesterday. We were unable to make it to the top of the mountain, and so we returned back to the car. As we returned, the weather got cooler, the clouds covered the sun, and we got some great photos of kangaroos.

Now, if we had done this walk according to plan, we likely wouldn't have got the photos of the kangaroos, as they wouldn't have been in that spot at that time.

There was also the fact that if we had've reached the top of the mountain, we would have met up with some other people that had started up there half an hour earlier than us. What if doing so would have been a bad thing in some way?

If things had gone according to plan, we would have started up the mountain before them, and probably encountered them on the way down. We also wouldn't have gotten the photos of the kangaroos and joeys, which was a really nice thing to find on the trail.

How often does this happen to you? How often do you make plans only to have them delayed, or frustrated in some way? How do you know that the frustrating of those plans isn't according to some design, that ultimately is of benefit to you? How do you know that if you followed those plans according to schedule, that something bad wouldn't have happened to you?

When you find all the stop lights red as you're going somewhere, maybe they're delaying you from being involved in an accident. If they were green, then you might make it to a particular point at a particular time, just in time to collide with another vehicle. But by being delayed, you avoid that collision.

When you are open to the universe working in your favour, you'll never know what misfortune you might avoid. And when you allow the universe to work in your favour, you'll certainly get to know about all the benefits it can bring you, one way or another.

If it's meant to be, let it be.
Don't fight the universe.
Go with the flow, and reap the benefits.

We went for a walk up to Gibraltar Rocks. This photo is from the starting point, and the destination is the rocky peak you can see towards the left there.

Here's a closeup of the rocky peak, followed by a bit of scenery along the way...



Unfortunately we didn't get all the way to the top. It was too hot (33 degrees = 91 fahrenheit) so we were slowed down (I found out I wasn't as fit as I thought I was - no surprised there, really). We got about 90% of the way and had to turn around and come back down, in order to make it in time for lunch in the city with a friend of mine. On the way down, we came upon some kangaroos in the trail. Here's proof, with a headshot of Deidre looking at the kangaroo, which was looking at us...

It was closely followed by a joey (baby kangaroo) peering curiously around the bushes at us...

And a few metres away in the bush was another kangaroo, this one with a joey in its pouch...

When we got back near the car there were a couple of emu's munching on the grass. They're about 5 feet high, just so you have some perspective on their size...

And then we met my old buddy Nick, who's been seen on here as 'nikos'. It was great to catch up with him again as well.

Funny story about the mountain climb... We had planned to be there by 9:30am, but we didn't get there until 10:30am, as we encountered a few annoying delays. By then it was hugely hot, and the climb up the mountain path was definitely a struggle. We took 4 bottles of water, to keep us going, and we could have easily drank more, as it was so hot! I had to rest a few times, as I was getting overheated and fatigued. I realised every other time I've climbed that hill, it was on cooler days. So we got 90% of the way and then came back, unfortunately not reaching our destination.

As soon as we turned back, clouds covered the sun and a cool breeze developed, cooling us down and making the trip back to the car a far more enjoyable one than the one going up the mountain. We talked about how the universe seemed to want to prevent us from going up there, and it was rewarding us as we returned. There were people about half an hour ahead of us, according to their sign-in of a bushwalkers' register, and so we wondered if the universe was suggesting that meeting them up the top there just wouldn't be a good idea...

It also gave us some nice kangaroo photos to take back with us, which we wouldn't have gotten if we'd come back at any other time... (I'll write a new post about what I mean with that.)